I am not a feminist. In fact,
if there is a term for the exact opposite of a feminist, then I am that. I have
spent twelve years of my life in an overwhelmingly female-populated
environment. And I certainly do not want to repeat the experience. I do not
hate women, but I cannot deny despising them. When I say ‘them’ I mean ninety
five percent of women. I acknowledge that I have also met women who are very
different, and I pride myself in not being a typical female. However, the fact
remains that these are a microscopic fraction of the female population all over
the world, and are usually dismissed as whackos and outcasts. Now, before my
readers start thinking of me as a prejudiced MCP (yeah, I will probably be
called that by feminists in spite of being a girl myself!) let me present my experiences
with women and the reasons that have led to my present state of mind. And right
at the beginning, I am reiterating that there are women against whom my
allegations do not hold true. I am hoping such women will realize that I have nothing
against them; in fact, they are the reason why I have not yet become completely
misogynistic.
From what I have seen, the most
defining characteristic of most women’s personalities is hypocrisy. Now, before
all my female readers start objecting loudly to my very demeaning observation,
let me give you some examples (all of these are anecdotes, either from my own experience
or of people I know well). I have known parents (and most of them have been
mothers) who have been unerringly polite and civil while talking to their
children’s teacher, and have started using uncouth language about the same
teacher as soon as the former is out of earshot. Speaking ill of people behind
their backs is undoubtedly a female trait. Any woman who has ever attended a
party will know how much time a group of women will spend criticizing their
absentee ‘friends’. And this attitude undergoes no change as women age: on
comparing notes after returning from two separate parties, my mother and I have
had startlingly similar experiences. So what my contemporaries talk about is in
no way different from what their mothers speak of.
In connection to my previous
allegation, I have to add that women are so obsessed
with their bodies. The other day my father was glancing through one of those
numerous women’s magazines, and he commented about how almost the entire
magazine was full of advertisements of different beauty products and salons and
shopping brands, and articles that give suggestions for enhancing one’s beauty.
The same thing can be seen on television. As I have mentioned once in one of my
earlier posts, women want to be
portrayed as bodies only. Among my classmates a very popular hobby is shopping.
I do not have many male acquaintances, so I cannot say this from intimate
knowledge, but I doubt how many males of
any age will cite shopping as their favourite hobby! Also, women are so desperate
to become clones of one another. When I go out I am often surprised by how all
the girls seem to look alike. They wear the same kinds of clothes and make-up,
walk, talk, giggle, pout and roll their eyes in the same way. Though we make a
lot out of ‘being a unique individual’, the truth is that girls are far more scared
of standing out in the crowd than men are. It is true that there is a certain
class of boys who also like to imitate each other and become as alike in
everything as possible, especially in clothes, motorbikes and attitude. But this
is not the majority among males, unlike in females. I still see men wearing
clothes as diverse as bermudas and pyjamas and dhoti, and having idiosyncratic personalities much oftener
than women.
Women also seem to get some
perverted, bestial fun by harming other people, especially other women. They
cannot bear to see other women being luckier than they, and will try to inflict
harm in one way or the other to their luckier sisters. I happen to be gifted by
unusual height in a country where must women are tiny. I cannot help being
tall; it is not something I had asked for or worked for, it was just given to
me. My height makes me stand out everywhere, and while I see the boys gaping at
me as if I were a phenomenon, the look in most women’s eyes is one of intense jealousy
and hatred. They behave as though I have become tall only in order to make them feel
inferior!
In most households, it is the
mother, the grandmother or one of the older female relatives who take up the role
of making their girl children realize that they have been born inferior to
boys, and so they should not try to behave like equals at all. Instead, they
should invest all their time and energy in dolling up beautifying themselves. I
can very well realize and sympathize with many of my father’s male ex-students
who seem to have no interest in girls at all. It’s time girls noticed that not
all boys are interested in looks alone. Some want more matter and substance in
girls, and by concentrating solely on their bodies the girls are losing out on
prospective (and, if I may say so, very eligible!)
boyfriends and husbands!
I can list many other reasons
for my attitude, but it’s Yuletide and I do not want the last blogpost of the
year to be a bitter one. So let me draw this subject to a close with the observation
that I would be doing grave injustice if I do not mention some of the women I
love and respect the most. My mother tops the list. Though I know I have just
made a very clichéd remark, I cannot help it. She is a wonderful person, and it
is to be said only incidentally that she is also a woman. Some of my best
friends are girls, and though they are very much aware of my anti-female
mindset, it does not bother them. They know instinctively that when I scoff at
women I do not have them in mind. Because, in my definition they are not really
girls, but human beings, and lovable ones at that. Then, I have met women who
are my father’s ex-students or wives/friends of ex-students who are very unlike
the typical woman that I have described, so they automatically fall into the 5%
of the female population that I admire. Most of the really successful women in
the world are non-feminists, probably because they do not think of themselves
as mere women in the first place. When I say this I have in mind J. K. Rowling,
Chhanda Kochhar, Naina lal Kidwai, Vinita Bali, Mrs. Margaret Thatcher, even
Vidya Balan and Julia Roberts. And when I talk of wonderful and respectable
women, I cannot forget Beth Morgan and Bronwen of How Green Was My Valley, Pilar of For Whom the Bell Tolls, Ma Joad of The Grapes of Wrath, Mariam
of A Thousand Splendid Suns and
Professor McGonagall of Harry Potter.
They define women in my mind.
Before I sign off, I wish everybody
a very merry Christmas and an equally happy New Year. This is my favourite
season; the weather is lovely, and there are so many happy days lying ahead in
the next two weeks. I am eagerly looking forward to our year-end trip. This
year, we’ll have some of dad’s ex-students with us, so hopefully it will be
even more enjoyable than usual. I shall be back with many more happy (and
interesting too, hopefully) experiences, and that will be my first post the
next year. So loads of love good wishes till then. Cheers :)
